
They hit the mic following a moving montage featuring famous Liverpool citizens including the late Paul O’Grady. Voiceover duties were by Rylan Clark and Scott Mills. Nearly 30 years since last winning Eurovision, Ireland hadn’t found what they are looking for. That said, Ireland did once again end up a tad tarred and feathered with Wild Youth’s U2-ish We Are One coming a cropper. There weren’t quite so many gobblers this time around, thankfully. The turkey was Dustin, who “sang” for Ireland at the 2008 Eurovision. The co-presenter looked like she was having the time of her life playing air guitar and trading quips with a rubber turkey. One helped massively by the pantomime dame energy put out by Ted Lasso star Hannah Waddingham. With the UK’s Mae Muller guaranteed a place in Saturday’s final, it was an opportunity to sit back and watch the comparative minnows scrap for a place at the big boys’s table at the weekend.

But less than tip-top hip-hop aside, it was an agreeably bonkers evening – if underpinned with sobering reminders that Eurovision was coming from the UK only because 2022 winners Ukraine were fighting for their right to exist against Russia. “We’re ready for a show/united by music/Eurovision let's go” was all of Dixon’s rhyming that I could jot down before madness took hold.

Her lyrics veered close to nul points territory. This year’s contest, from the Liverpool Arena, featured surrealist Croats with weaponised moustaches, body-popping Moldovan Vikings and Alesha Dixon performing what felt like an impromptu Eurovision rap but which, despite all the evidence to the contrary, had surely been rehearsed to death in advance. Tuesday nights land differently when Eurovision semi-final (BBC One) comes around.
